Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Flaming Boxer Shorts Used to Start Fire...and Ultrarunning

From the local paper last week on 18 March, the Chambersburg Public Opinion, we have another stupid fire story, entitled Flaming Boxer Shorts Used to Start Fire; 3 Arrested.  No, the story itself is well done; it's the crime described that is stupid.  I previously blogged about another stupid fire here, where some local dummies tried to blow up a car with flaming tampons.

In this latest stupid fire incident, 3 stooges set a couple cars afire with flaming boxer shorts:

Armstrong allegedly told police that he and the brothers had taken part in setting the vehicles on fire. He said they were "looking at scrap" when they approached the Talon and Joshua Jones pulled a pair of "boxer style" briefs out of the truck.

"Armstrong indicated that he used his lighter to ignite the briefs, which were thrown back into the trunk area of the vehicle by Joshua Jones," the affidavit states. He added that Jason Jones poured a liquid into the vehicle before the flaming underwear were thrown in.

Jason and Joshua Jones told police that they met at Armstrong's home to go to the salvage yard. They said Jason Jones had poured "tire shine" onto some clothing inside the car and they left the scene when the fire spread to the second vehicle.

All three men are charged with third-degree felony arson. They are also charged with misdemeanors including reckless endangerment, criminal trespass and criminal mischief.

This fire behavior seems like it may be a regular occurrence locally, and so may become a regular feature here at Mister Tristan (the blog, not the 4-year-old human being).  I will continue to scan the paper and keep you all informed.

Oh, and the link to Ultrarunning?  There seemingly are a lot of hillbillies around here, and sometimes I do think about encountering some of them on the trail.  The good news is that such "hoofties," as a friend calls them, only go into the woods to party and then only close by a trailhead.

So the chances are excellent of never seeing a hooftie in the backcountry, and if you do, you have a secret weapon: the ability to run.

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